Este último mes fue muy difícil para mí, luego de haber viajado y descubierto que el mundo es muchísimo más grande de lo que parece, para regresar a mi país donde admito que siempre me he sentido un poco como un extranjero. No es que me siento de otro lugar en particular, sino que luego de estar mucho tiempo en un sólo sitio, suelo sentirme estancado. Tengo teorías sobre las vidas que tal vez tuve antes de ésta, de seguro en alguna de ellas (o todas) fui explorador(a) y nómada.
También es que en mi ingenuidad, no me esperaba que al regresar la mentalidad colectiva del país fuera una de terror ante el inminente caos monumental que enfrentamos en estos tiempos. Los cambios son muy rápidos y confusos para la mayoría de nosotros.
Pero el shock del regreso se ha sumergido, y ha dado paso al aprecio de la infinidad de oportunidades que ofrece la vida. Recientemente me he dado cuenta de muchas cosas, me he permitido ser más honesto conmigo mismo que antes, y por consecuente me encuentro siendo más honesto con los demás. Comienzo a comprender que tal vez la vida es un rompecabezas que tengo que armar con las piezas que tengo a mi alcance. Llevo haciendome las mismas preguntas desde mis memorias más remotas, y pienso que tal vez son ancestrales, que llevo varias vidas haciendome las mismas preguntas, intentando armar el mismo rompecabezas de piezas infinitas.
O tal vez esté delirando.
Pensando en tí,
z
This last month was a very difficult time for me, after traveling and discovering that the world is much bigger than it seems, to return to my country where i admit i have always felt a bit like a foreigner. It's not that I feel like I belong somewhere else in particular, it's just that after being in the same place for a long time, I tend to feel stuck. I have theories about the possible lives I may have lived before now, and explorer or nomad are definitely on the list.
Also, in my naiveté i wasn't expecting the collective mentality of the nation to be one of terror regarding the impending monumental chaos we are all facing in these times. The changes are too fast and confusing for most of us to be able to handle.
But the shock of return has subsided, and given way to an appreciation of the infinity of opportunities that life has to offer. I have recently become aware of many things about myself, allowing me to be more honest with myself and subsequently more honest with the people around me. I begin to see that life might just be an enormous jigsaw puzzle, that I must put together with the pieces I have within my reach. I have been asking myself the same questions ever since my remotest memories, and I wonder if they may just be ancestral, if I have been asking myself these same questions over several lifetimes, trying to put together the same infinite puzzle.
Or maybe I'm just delirious.
Thinking of you,
z
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Sunday, August 31, 2008
Viaje por el tiempo / Time travel
La incertidumbre de los planes futuros se esfuma al concretizarse en presentes explosivos, que a su vez dan paso a memorias de un pasado efímero. El tiempo es una construcción humana, que existe y no existe a la vez, como tantas de las cosas que componen nuestra realidad humana. Cuando uno viaja, siente la extraña sensación de que el tiempo se detiene pero que también vuela. Ahora de vuelta, siento que lo mismo pasó aquí, pero diferente. "El tiempo pasa, pero ni tanto..."
El regreso a Puerto Rico fue muy extraño. Me habían dicho que regresar siempre es lo más difícil, pero nada me podía preparar para esto. Sólo me fui 2 meses, pero se siente como un año. Cuando vivía en New Jersey y regresaba de vacaciones, nunca se sintió así. Eso que escribí antes de irme sobre cómo todo sería diferente al regrersar fue tan cierto que asusta. Nuevo hogar, nuevos proyectos, nuev@s amig@s, nueva perspectiva... hasta cierto punto siento que soy una nueva persona. Es muy cierto lo que dicen, viajar te cambia.
Sé que te debo muchas fotos, y muchas historias que las acompañan. Las historias surgirán espontáneamente a lo largo de nuestras vidas. Las fotos las subiré tan pronto resluelva unos problemas técnicos (y económicos).
Pensando en tí,
z
The uncertainty of future plans fades as it manifests into an explosive present, which in turn give way to memories of a short-lived past. Time is a human construction that simultaneously exists and doesn't exist, like so many of the things that compose our human reality. When one travels, one feels the strange sensation that time stops and flies at the same time. Upon my return, I feel like the same thing happened here, but differently. "Time passes, but not so much..."
The return to Puerto Rico was very strange. I had been warned that the most difficult part is always the return, but nothing could have prepared me for this. I was only gone for 2 months, but I feel like I was gone for a year. When I lived in New Jersey and came back for vacations, it never felt this way. What I wrote before leaving about how when I returned everything would be different turned out to be so true it's scary. New home, new projects, new friends, new perspective... I even feel like in some ways I'm a new person. What they say is true, travel changes you.
I know I owe you lots of pictures and stories to go with them. The stories will arise spontaneously throughout the rest of our lives. The pictures will be posted as soon as I resolve some technical (and economic) difficulties.
Thinking of you,
z
El regreso a Puerto Rico fue muy extraño. Me habían dicho que regresar siempre es lo más difícil, pero nada me podía preparar para esto. Sólo me fui 2 meses, pero se siente como un año. Cuando vivía en New Jersey y regresaba de vacaciones, nunca se sintió así. Eso que escribí antes de irme sobre cómo todo sería diferente al regrersar fue tan cierto que asusta. Nuevo hogar, nuevos proyectos, nuev@s amig@s, nueva perspectiva... hasta cierto punto siento que soy una nueva persona. Es muy cierto lo que dicen, viajar te cambia.
Sé que te debo muchas fotos, y muchas historias que las acompañan. Las historias surgirán espontáneamente a lo largo de nuestras vidas. Las fotos las subiré tan pronto resluelva unos problemas técnicos (y económicos).
Pensando en tí,
z
The uncertainty of future plans fades as it manifests into an explosive present, which in turn give way to memories of a short-lived past. Time is a human construction that simultaneously exists and doesn't exist, like so many of the things that compose our human reality. When one travels, one feels the strange sensation that time stops and flies at the same time. Upon my return, I feel like the same thing happened here, but differently. "Time passes, but not so much..."
The return to Puerto Rico was very strange. I had been warned that the most difficult part is always the return, but nothing could have prepared me for this. I was only gone for 2 months, but I feel like I was gone for a year. When I lived in New Jersey and came back for vacations, it never felt this way. What I wrote before leaving about how when I returned everything would be different turned out to be so true it's scary. New home, new projects, new friends, new perspective... I even feel like in some ways I'm a new person. What they say is true, travel changes you.
I know I owe you lots of pictures and stories to go with them. The stories will arise spontaneously throughout the rest of our lives. The pictures will be posted as soon as I resolve some technical (and economic) difficulties.
Thinking of you,
z
Monday, August 11, 2008
Tantas caras... so many faces
Masa lach' ol (saludo en kekchi Maya). Primero que nada, te pido disculpas por no haberte escrito en tanto tiempo. Las palabras no me bastan para expresar todo lo que mi mente aun no ha tenido tiempo de procesar en las ultimas ni se cuantas semanas. Uno ve tantas caras, conoce tantas personas en este oceano infinito de la humanidad, que a veces se puede quedar sin aliento.
Estuvimos en Belize, un pais maravilloso, mucho antes de lo esperado, y aprovechamos para tomar las cosas con mas calma, y ahora nos damos cuenta de que la fuerza que nos daba empujones en Honduras realmente queria que llegaramos con mas tiempo a Guatemala. Me alegro muchisimo de que Guatemala fue el ultimo pais que visitamos. Definitivamente ha sido el lugar mas fascinante del viaje. Lamentablemente solo nos quedan siete dias, y no tenemos suficiente tiempo para hacer ni verlo todo. Uno podria estar los dos meses completos solamente aqui en Guate y aun desear mas tiempo para explorar.
Tal como predecido, un viaje como este le cambia a uno la perspectiva por completo. Regreso en una semana refrescado e inspirado, con un mejor conocimiento de mi mismo, una amistad mas profunda con mi primo y compañero de viaje Jose, y con muchisimas ideas nuevas para el futuro.
A ti que haz estado siguiendo mis pasos por aqui, te digo bantiosh (gracias). Tu apoyo es el que me ha alegrado y aliviado los momentos dificiles y solitarios, cuando dudaba de mi propia cordura durante esta travesia.
Prometo que tan pronto pueda, subire las fotos de la segunda mitad del vaje.
Huanchic.
Pensando en ti,
z
Masa lach' ol (hello in Kekchi Maya). First of all, I would like to apologize for not having written to you in such a long time. Words are not enough to express all that my mind has not had time to precess in the last dont know how many weeks. One sees so many faces, meets so many people in this infinite human ocean, that at times it can be overwhelming.
We were in Belize, a wonderful country, much sooner than expected, and we used the opportunity to take things a bit slower than before. But now we see that the forces that pushed us forward in Honduras were really trying to give us more time in Guatemala. I am extremely glad we are visiting Guatemala last, it has definitely been the most fascinating of all the countries we have visited. Unfortunately we only have seven days left, which is not enough time to do and see everything we would like to. One could spend the entire two months only in Guate, and still want more time to explore.
Just as predicted, a trip such as this one completely changes one's perspective on things. I return in a week refreshed and inspired, with a much deeper knowledge of myself, a close friendship with my cousin and travel partner Jose, and many new ideas for the future.
To you, who have been following along through here, I say bantiosh (thank you). It is your support that has helped me through the dificult and lonely moments when I doubted my own sanity during this voyage.
I promise that I will post pictures of the second half of the trip as soon as I can.
Huanchic.
Thinking of you,
z
Estuvimos en Belize, un pais maravilloso, mucho antes de lo esperado, y aprovechamos para tomar las cosas con mas calma, y ahora nos damos cuenta de que la fuerza que nos daba empujones en Honduras realmente queria que llegaramos con mas tiempo a Guatemala. Me alegro muchisimo de que Guatemala fue el ultimo pais que visitamos. Definitivamente ha sido el lugar mas fascinante del viaje. Lamentablemente solo nos quedan siete dias, y no tenemos suficiente tiempo para hacer ni verlo todo. Uno podria estar los dos meses completos solamente aqui en Guate y aun desear mas tiempo para explorar.
Tal como predecido, un viaje como este le cambia a uno la perspectiva por completo. Regreso en una semana refrescado e inspirado, con un mejor conocimiento de mi mismo, una amistad mas profunda con mi primo y compañero de viaje Jose, y con muchisimas ideas nuevas para el futuro.
A ti que haz estado siguiendo mis pasos por aqui, te digo bantiosh (gracias). Tu apoyo es el que me ha alegrado y aliviado los momentos dificiles y solitarios, cuando dudaba de mi propia cordura durante esta travesia.
Prometo que tan pronto pueda, subire las fotos de la segunda mitad del vaje.
Huanchic.
Pensando en ti,
z
Masa lach' ol (hello in Kekchi Maya). First of all, I would like to apologize for not having written to you in such a long time. Words are not enough to express all that my mind has not had time to precess in the last dont know how many weeks. One sees so many faces, meets so many people in this infinite human ocean, that at times it can be overwhelming.
We were in Belize, a wonderful country, much sooner than expected, and we used the opportunity to take things a bit slower than before. But now we see that the forces that pushed us forward in Honduras were really trying to give us more time in Guatemala. I am extremely glad we are visiting Guatemala last, it has definitely been the most fascinating of all the countries we have visited. Unfortunately we only have seven days left, which is not enough time to do and see everything we would like to. One could spend the entire two months only in Guate, and still want more time to explore.
Just as predicted, a trip such as this one completely changes one's perspective on things. I return in a week refreshed and inspired, with a much deeper knowledge of myself, a close friendship with my cousin and travel partner Jose, and many new ideas for the future.
To you, who have been following along through here, I say bantiosh (thank you). It is your support that has helped me through the dificult and lonely moments when I doubted my own sanity during this voyage.
I promise that I will post pictures of the second half of the trip as soon as I can.
Huanchic.
Thinking of you,
z
Monday, July 21, 2008
Luna Llena, parte 2 / Full Moon, part 2
La segunda luna llena que marcó el punto medio de nuestro viaje nos alumbró desde detrás de nubes de lluvia durante nuestra corta estadía en Honduras. No se por qué, pero la luna llena suele tener un efecto misterioso en mi psiquis y emociones, que sólo puedo describir como caótico. No es positivo ni negativo, pero casi siempre implica cambios y ajustes que me obligan a tomar decisiones en las cuales siempre hay una lección para aprender. A veces es mas evidente que otras, pero es bastante frecuente.
Nos encontramos ahora en un pueblo en Guatemala llamado Livingston, que está completamente desconectado por vias terrestres del resto del pais, y solo se llega en lancha, aunque no es una isla. Es un pequeño y encantador pueblo garifuna, una cultura descendiente de esclavos antillanos mezclados con indios Caribe, y bastante diferente a todo lo que hemos presenciado hasta ahora. Esta mañana cruzamos la frontera desde Honduras, y mañana cruzaremos en barco hasta Belize.
Cómo llegamos hasta aqui tan rapido es producto de nuestra odisea lunar hondureña bastante misteriosa, que incluye, pero no se limita a, caos nacional general, lluvia constante, mala comunicacion, y una billetera desaparecida. Todos estos factores nos dieron empujones sutiles pero recurrentes hasta encontrarnos aqui, casi sin darnos cuenta. Sin embargo, antes de irnos, visitamos las ruinas de Copan, en la frontera de Honduras con Guatemala, y eso sí es impresionante. Cuando entramos a Guatemala, nos perdimos la oportunidad de cambiar todos nuestros lempiras (moneda hondureña) por quetzales (Guatemala), y ahora nos enteramos que son basicamente inútiles. La condena de Honduras no nos quiere dejar ir tranquilos, y nos sigue causando inconveniencias incluso ya fuera del pais. Supongo que debo aprender a sencillamente dejarlo ir.
Existe una atraccion misteriosa y perceptible que nos hala en la direccion que vamos. No me esperaba estar tan adelande tan rapido, algo que em emociona mucho, porque algo me dice que vamos a necesitar más tiempo para explorar las regiones que nos quedan por explorar.
Tenemos un problema de horarios de sueño que no hemos descubierto como resolver. Nos gusta levantarnos temprano para aprovechar los dias, pero no sabemos como acostarnos temprano, ya que nuestras conversaciones mas importantes suelen suceder a las altas horas de la noche. Y esas conversaciones entonces nutren nuestra experiencia por el dia.
Pensando en usted,
z
The second full moon, that marked the halfway point of our adventure, shined on us from behind heavy rainclouds above us during our short stay in Honduras. I dont know why, but the full moon tends to have a psichological and emotional effect on me that I can only describe as chaotic. It is neither positive or negative, but it invariably implies changes and adjustments that force me to make decisions through which there are always lessons to be learned. It is not always obvious, but it is pretty frecuent.
We currently find ourselves in a small town in Guatemala called Lívingston, which is completely cut off by road from the rest of the counrty, and is only accessible by boat, although it is not an island. It is a lovely, small Garifuna town, which is a culture that is descended from african slaves from the antilles, and carib indians, and quite different from anything we have experienced so far. We crossed the border from Honduras this morning, and tomorrow morning we arrive in Belize by boat.
How we arrived here so fast is a product of our misterious lunar honduran odissey, which includes, but is not limited to, generalized national chaos, constant rain, bad communication, and a lost wallet. All of these factors were sublte but constant forces that pushed us forward, untill suddenly finding ourselves here, almost without realizing what happened. However, before leaving, we visited the Mayan ruins of Copan on the border with Guatemala, which are very impressive. Once in Guatemala, we missed our chance to exchange all of our lempiras (honduran currency) for quetzales (Guatemala), and now we find out that they are basically worthless. The curse of Honduras continues to haunt us even outside of the country. I guess I should learn to just let it go.
There is a mistreious but perceptible force pulling us in the direction that we are going in. I didnt expect to be so far ahead so soon, something which is oddly very exciting to me, because i get the feeling that we are going to need more time to explore what we have left of the region.
We have a problem with our sleep schedule that we have not yet figured out how to solve. We like getting up early to make the most of teh day, but we dont know how to go to bed early, since our most important conversations tend to happen in the late hours of the evening. And those conversations then influence our experience during the day.
Thinking of you,
z
Nos encontramos ahora en un pueblo en Guatemala llamado Livingston, que está completamente desconectado por vias terrestres del resto del pais, y solo se llega en lancha, aunque no es una isla. Es un pequeño y encantador pueblo garifuna, una cultura descendiente de esclavos antillanos mezclados con indios Caribe, y bastante diferente a todo lo que hemos presenciado hasta ahora. Esta mañana cruzamos la frontera desde Honduras, y mañana cruzaremos en barco hasta Belize.
Cómo llegamos hasta aqui tan rapido es producto de nuestra odisea lunar hondureña bastante misteriosa, que incluye, pero no se limita a, caos nacional general, lluvia constante, mala comunicacion, y una billetera desaparecida. Todos estos factores nos dieron empujones sutiles pero recurrentes hasta encontrarnos aqui, casi sin darnos cuenta. Sin embargo, antes de irnos, visitamos las ruinas de Copan, en la frontera de Honduras con Guatemala, y eso sí es impresionante. Cuando entramos a Guatemala, nos perdimos la oportunidad de cambiar todos nuestros lempiras (moneda hondureña) por quetzales (Guatemala), y ahora nos enteramos que son basicamente inútiles. La condena de Honduras no nos quiere dejar ir tranquilos, y nos sigue causando inconveniencias incluso ya fuera del pais. Supongo que debo aprender a sencillamente dejarlo ir.
Existe una atraccion misteriosa y perceptible que nos hala en la direccion que vamos. No me esperaba estar tan adelande tan rapido, algo que em emociona mucho, porque algo me dice que vamos a necesitar más tiempo para explorar las regiones que nos quedan por explorar.
Tenemos un problema de horarios de sueño que no hemos descubierto como resolver. Nos gusta levantarnos temprano para aprovechar los dias, pero no sabemos como acostarnos temprano, ya que nuestras conversaciones mas importantes suelen suceder a las altas horas de la noche. Y esas conversaciones entonces nutren nuestra experiencia por el dia.
Pensando en usted,
z
The second full moon, that marked the halfway point of our adventure, shined on us from behind heavy rainclouds above us during our short stay in Honduras. I dont know why, but the full moon tends to have a psichological and emotional effect on me that I can only describe as chaotic. It is neither positive or negative, but it invariably implies changes and adjustments that force me to make decisions through which there are always lessons to be learned. It is not always obvious, but it is pretty frecuent.
We currently find ourselves in a small town in Guatemala called Lívingston, which is completely cut off by road from the rest of the counrty, and is only accessible by boat, although it is not an island. It is a lovely, small Garifuna town, which is a culture that is descended from african slaves from the antilles, and carib indians, and quite different from anything we have experienced so far. We crossed the border from Honduras this morning, and tomorrow morning we arrive in Belize by boat.
How we arrived here so fast is a product of our misterious lunar honduran odissey, which includes, but is not limited to, generalized national chaos, constant rain, bad communication, and a lost wallet. All of these factors were sublte but constant forces that pushed us forward, untill suddenly finding ourselves here, almost without realizing what happened. However, before leaving, we visited the Mayan ruins of Copan on the border with Guatemala, which are very impressive. Once in Guatemala, we missed our chance to exchange all of our lempiras (honduran currency) for quetzales (Guatemala), and now we find out that they are basically worthless. The curse of Honduras continues to haunt us even outside of the country. I guess I should learn to just let it go.
There is a mistreious but perceptible force pulling us in the direction that we are going in. I didnt expect to be so far ahead so soon, something which is oddly very exciting to me, because i get the feeling that we are going to need more time to explore what we have left of the region.
We have a problem with our sleep schedule that we have not yet figured out how to solve. We like getting up early to make the most of teh day, but we dont know how to go to bed early, since our most important conversations tend to happen in the late hours of the evening. And those conversations then influence our experience during the day.
Thinking of you,
z
Monday, July 14, 2008
Nicaragua
Tierra de Lagos y Volcanes. Con una belleza natural y cultural increíble, un pasado revolucionario fascinante, un presente corrupto y lamentable y un futuro inseguro, es el segundo país con más pobreza de las Américas, sobrepasado sólo por Haití. La disparidad entre los privilegiados y los menos privilegiados es enorme, y obliga a uno a pensar seriamente en la complejidad del mundo moderno y las posibilidades para el futuro. Pero es difícil, y se corre el peligro de agobiarse y preferir ignorarlo todo, algo que nunca puedo permitirme que suceda.
Nos hemos estado quedando con mi amigo S., quien ha estado viviendo aquí desde hace 3 años, trabajando en un proyecto de ecuturismo. Me alegra mucho haber podido verlo, ya que llevábamos muchísimo tiempo sin vernos. Hoy celebramos su cumpleaños, y mañana continuamos hacia el norte: Honduras, tal vez El Salvador si decidimos que tenemos tiempo. Vamos a un paso demasiado veloz. La próxima vez lo haré diferente.Creo que regreso a este país, pero a hacer algo más productivo que solamente turistear.
Pensando en ti,
z
Land of lakes and volcanoes, with incredible natural and cultural beauty, a fascinating revolutionary past, a corrupt and lamentable present, and an insecure future, it is the second poorest country in the Americas after Haiti. The disparity between the privileged and the underpriveleged is enormous, and it obligates me to think hard about the complxity of the modern world and the posibilities for the future. But it is hard, and one runs the risk of becoming overwhelmed and choose to ignore it all, something I just cannot allow myself to do. 
We have been staying at my friend S.'s house, who has been living here for the past 3 years, working on an ecotourism project. I'm very happy I got this oportunity, since we hadn't seen each other in such a long time. Tonight we celebrate his birthday, and tomorrow we continue north toward Hondruas, and possibly El Salvador if we decide we have the time. We are moving way too fast. Next time I will do it differently.
I think I will be returning to this country, but to do something more productive than just being a tourist.
Thinking of you, z
Saturday, July 5, 2008
Caminando
En Panamá, caminamos, con nuestras mochilas de 20-25lbs cada una, desde un pueblo llamado Volcán hasta otro pueblo llamado Boquete, por un sendero en las montañas llamado Sendero los Quetzales. El sendero solamente es 13km, mas 10km de carretera y camino de piedra antes y después. Menos mal que trabajadores del área compadecieron de nuestra locura, y nos "lifiaron" hasta la entrada y luego hasta el pueblo de Boquete. Fue una caminata exagerada, pero nos demostró que somos capaces de mucho más de lo que creíamos.
In Panama, we walked, wearing our 20-25lb packs, from a town called Volcan to another town called Boquete, following a trail called Sendero los Quetzales. The trail by itself is 13km, plus 10km of roads and stone paths before and after. Thank goodness that workers in the area felt pity for our insalnity and gave us lift to the entrance, and then to the town of Boquete. It was a ridiculous hike, but it showed us that we are capable of much more than we thought.
In Panama, we walked, wearing our 20-25lb packs, from a town called Volcan to another town called Boquete, following a trail called Sendero los Quetzales. The trail by itself is 13km, plus 10km of roads and stone paths before and after. Thank goodness that workers in the area felt pity for our insalnity and gave us lift to the entrance, and then to the town of Boquete. It was a ridiculous hike, but it showed us that we are capable of much more than we thought.
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